The Unbearable Lightness of Friendship Homosociality and the “Crisis of Masculinity”

Abstract

Over the past 30 years in the US there has been a lot of discussion around boys’ and men’s friendships, or the lack thereof. Not only are men, we are told, lacking in friendships, but these friendships are also lacking in affection, emotion, and depth. This so-called crisis is deeply intertwined with the broader social, political, and economic crisis having an impact on boys’ lives. This article will seek to elaborate on the importance of homosociality in discussions of crisis and will be examine friendships in light of these changing relational possibilities. The masculinity model put into place by the ‘crisis’ discourse is premised on a version of masculinity that is competitive and aggressive. In examining homosociality and crisis, this article will present two individual case studies who showcase the ways that the crisis narrative is misleading and does not provide a true picture of the complexity of men’s relationships.

Keywords

• Mixed marriages,Christian-Muslim couples,Muslim masculinity

Arkadaşlığın Dayanılmaz Hafifliği: Homososyallik ve "Erkeklik Krizi"

Öz

Geçtiğimiz 30 yıl boyunca Amerikan literatüründe oğlan çocuklarının ve erkeklerin arkadaşlığı veya arkadaşlığın eksikliği üzerine birçok tartışma yürütüldü. Erkeklerin arkadaşlık kurma açısından eksikliğinin yanı sıra bizlere erkeklerin kurdukları arkadaşlık ilişkilerinde derinlik, duygu ve yakınlık eksikliği olduğu da söylendi. Bu sözde kriz, oğlan çocuklarının hayatında etkili olan geniş çaplı sosyal, politik ve ekonomik krizlerle birbirine karışmış durumdadır. Bu makale, homososyalliğin bahsi geçen kriz üzerindeki etkisini detaylandıracak ve arkadaşlığı değişen bu ilişkisel olasılıklar ışığında inceleyecektir. "Kriz" söylemiyle ortaya konan erkeklik modeli rekabetçi ve agresif bir erkeklik versiyonunu temel almaktadır.  Bu bağlamda, bu makale kriz söylemlerinin ve anlatımlarının ne kadar yanıltıcı bir yol gösterdiği ve erkek ilişkilerindeki karmaşıklığı doğru yansıtmadığını gösteren iki adet bireysel vaka çalışması sunarak homososyalliği ve erkeklik krizini inceleyecektir.

Anahtar Kelimeler

• karma evlilik,hristiyan-müslüman eşler,müslüman erkeklik

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