AN EXTRAORDINARY MARRIAGE STORY: MARRIAGE BETWEEN MUSLIM WOMEN AND NON-MUSLIM MEN

Öz

Despite the widespread opinion in the Islamic tradition that it is forbidden for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim, many Muslim women marry out of religions in Western countries. In this study, the decision-making processes of Muslim women in this unusual marriage and the attitudes of their families towards interfaith marriage were examined. The research is based on semi-structured interviews with 19 Muslim women married to non-Muslim men. Firstly, the research data revealed that the main reason for Muslim women to decide on such a marriage is 'love'. Many Muslim women decided to get married to non-Muslim men because they fell in love and wanted to spend the rest of their lives together, which is similar to the reasons for most marriages. Also, living away from the family has been a factor that facilitated the process of deciding to marry for Muslim women and reduced the family pressure. Although some of the Muslim families showed a supportive attitude towards interfaith marriage, most of the families had a negative attitude towards their daughters marrying a man from a different religion. The religious differences, cultural differences, community pressure and personal concerns all played an important role in the families’ attitudes. Non-Muslim families, on the other hand, preferred to abstain, leaving the final decision to their sons, even if they thought negatively about their sons marrying a Muslim girl. However, the common concern of the children of both Muslim and non-Muslim families about their marriage is the possibility of being pressured about their religious beliefs or being forced to convert.

Anahtar Kelimeler

• ociology of Religion
• Interfaith Marriages
• Mixed Marriages
• Muslim Woman

An Extraordinary Marriage Story: Marriage between Muslim Women and Non-Muslim Men

Öz

Despite the widespread opinion in the Islamic tradition that it is forbidden for a Muslim woman to marry a non-Muslim, many Muslim women marry out of religions in Western countries. In this study, the decision-making processes of Muslim women in this unusual marriage and the attitudes of their families towards interfaith marriage were examined. The research is based on semi-structured interviews with 19 Muslim women married to non-Muslim men. Firstly, the research data revealed that the main reason for Muslim women to decide on such a marriage is 'love'. Many Muslim women decided to get married to non-Muslim men because they fell in love and wanted to spend the rest of their lives together, which is similar to the reasons for most marriages. Also, living away from the family has been a factor that facilitated the process of deciding to marry for Muslim women and reduced the family pressure. Although some of the Muslim families showed a supportive attitude towards interfaith marriage, most of the families had a negative attitude towards their daughters marrying a man from a different religion. The religious differences, cultural differences, community pressure and personal concerns all played an important role in the families’ attitudes. Non-Muslim families, on the other hand, preferred to abstain, leaving the final decision to their sons, even if they thought negatively about their sons marrying a Muslim girl. However, the common concern of the children of both Muslim and non-Muslim families about their marriage is the possibility of being pressured about their religious beliefs or being forced to convert.

Anahtar Kelimeler

• Sociology of Religion
• Interfaith Marriages
• Mixed Marriages
• Muslim Woman

Çizgi Dışı Bir Evlilik Hikayesi: Müslüman Kadının Gayri Müslim Erkekle Evliliği

Öz

İslam geleneğinde yaygın kabul gören Müslüman kadının gayri müslim erkekle evliliğinin yasak olduğu kanaatine rağmen özellikle Batılı ülkelerde birçok Müslüman kadın farklı dine mensup bir erkekle evlenmektedir. Bu çalışmada Müslüman kadınların sıra dışı kabul edilebilecek bu evliliklerinde karar verme süreçleri ve ailelerinin dinlerarası evliliğe karşı tutumları incelenmiştir. Araştırma, İngiltere’de yaşayan, eşleri gayri müslim olan 19 Müslüman kadınla yapılan yarı yapılandırılmış görüşmelere dayanmaktadır. Araştırma sonucuna göre Müslüman kadınların böyle bir evliliğe karar vermelerindeki öncelikli sebep ‘aşk’tır. Katılımcılar, birçok evlilikle olduğu gibi, aşık oldukları ve hayatlarının geri kalanını birlikte geçirmek istedikleri için gayrimüslim erkeklerle evlenmeye karar vermişlerdir. Bununla beraber, aileden ayrı yaşıyor olmak Müslüman kadınlar için evliliğe karar vermede süreci kolaylaştırıcı, üzerlerindeki aile baskısını azaltıcı bir unsur olmuştur. Müslüman ailelerden bir kısmı karma evliliğine karşı destekleyici bir tavır gösterseler de katılımcıların çoğunun ailesi kızlarının farklı dine mensup bir erkekle evlenmesine karşı olumsuz bir tutum sergilemiştir. Ailelerin bu tutumunda din farklılığı, kültür farklılığı, toplumsal baskı ve kişisel kaygılar önemli rol oynamıştır. Gayri müslim aileler ise oğullarının Müslüman bir kızla evlenmesine olumsuz baksalar dahi, nihai kararı oğullarına bırakarak çekimser kalmışlardır. Bununla beraber hem Müslüman hem de gayri müslim ailelerin çocuklarının evlilikleri konusunda ortak endişeleri evliliklerinde dini inançları konusunda baskı görme yahut da din değiştirmeye zorlanma ihtimalleridir.

Anahtar Kelimeler

• Din Sosyolojisi
• Dinlerarası Evlilik
• Karma Evlilik
• Müslüman Kadın

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